Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
