Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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