what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
