I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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