does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Please don't give away my fajitas
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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