ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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