Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize