Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
That accounts for only three of the penises
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
