I forgot how hot balto sounded
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
