I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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