he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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