What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
