I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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