i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
The Olympian is in my bed
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
