butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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