We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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