youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
