a queef is a wish your heart makes.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
