i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Randomize