Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Randomize
