Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize