Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize