I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
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I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
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You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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