Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
