In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
