he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
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he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
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He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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