...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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