okay pat passed out under dana's car
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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