you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
