Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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