brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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