I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
are you so shy because you have an std?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
