Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
