she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
