Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
