I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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