hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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