problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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