Christians are straight up FREAKS
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Brb crying the tears of my youth
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Randomize