Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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