Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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