I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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