love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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