My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize