sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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