I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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