I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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