I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I just found puke in my bra..
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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