I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
