the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Let's paint friendship bongs
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
