Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
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